Common Ground

Sunday, 13 November 2016

COMMON GROUND

     I live in a demonstrably conservative neighborhood. Two things you will see a lot of in this part of the Southwest Metro Area are Christian churches and military families. Just about every bumper sticker you can read in the local driveways here will most likely mention gun rights, Jesus, a branch of the Armed Forces, or all of the above.

     You might think, then, that there would have been jubilant celebration in my neighborhood after the results of this most recent presidential election. There was not. Homer and I go for daily walks through this neighborhood, and the general vibe I get from the local populace is neither jubilant nor celebratory. In fact, if I had to put a single adjective on it, I would say the mood here is worried.

     Already I can hear my liberal friends sneering, “What do they have to worry about? Their candidate won, right?”. Yes, he did, but here is the thing: most of my neighbors are conservatives, but almost none of them are idiots. They are fully aware that The Don was everyone’s last choice, including their own. I suspect most Americans who voted for Mr. Drumpf have spent nearly every waking hour since then worried sick about whether or not they made a good decision.

     In essence, it seems, liberals fear (and rightly so) the threats built into every last one of Mr. Drumpf’s campaign promises. On the other hand, conservatives are deeply concerned (and rightly so) because King Orange clearly cannot be trusted any further than a man could heave him by his pumpkin-colored comb-over.

     I believe it is time for people to begin looking past their binary differences to find the common ground between them, and The Don has unwittingly provided just such a meeting point. Whether you voted for or against Him; whether you think Him a shithead or a visionary; no matter what end of the Ass-to-Elephant spectrum you fall most closely under, we can all unite in the fact that ABSOLUTELY NONE OF US trusts the next president.

     This fact alone may be enough to guide us. Whatever dilemmas you face in the next eight years, just think What would Drumpf do? and then do the opposite, secure at last that you are most likely doing the Right Thing.